Are you Taken?

Friday night saw Shoddy and I out for a night on the town to let off some steam. It was destined to be one of those nights when we were invited to dinner by a couple of likely lads two minutes after getting out of the taxi. We declined, of course, but only after getting their details for an interview. There are evenings when there must be something in the air and the male population seems to get that little bit braver...

It was also the night when the question we heard most was, 'Are you married?' Now this is quite a new one on us. We completely understand that a man doesn't want to waste his time and effort talking to you if you are already taken but it seems that having a boyfriend, whether for a couple of months or five years still means that you are fair game. Until you have made that final public commitment of marriage, perhaps all is fair in love and war. Often in the early to mid-stages of a relationship you are just trying your partner out for size and even more often, according to our polls, if you find they don't fit perfectly, you keep them on until you've found something better.

Shoddy disagrees vehemently with this. If you're in a steady relationship with someone, marriage or no marriage, then it's a definite no-go area. So single ladies out there be warned! But, if truth be told, if you meet a man of a certain age who is not married or going out with someone and who hasn't got two heads, you do find yourself asking 'What is wrong with him?' Cynical? Damn right.

So is the wedding ring an emotional and practical shield of steel, protecting you from the unwanted advances of the opposite sex? Everybody likes to be chatted up, don't they? It makes you feel sexy and powerful, it turbo-charges your confidence and gives you a natural high. We all have free will. Surely it is up to you to say where the line is between the flirty chat and the new relationship. Do we have to set rules for each other because we don't trust our partners to do the right thing? Or is the problem that we don't trust ourselves?

Why is it that when our partners stray, we always heap more blame on 'the one who took them away' than on our other half? The 'one who took them away' had no obligation to anyone apart from themselves but our partners (probably ex-partners by this stage!) had a commitment to us. And they are the ones that broke this commitment. But we prefer to blame, in this scenario, the 'other woman' and divest our men of responsibility. Do us ladies really believe that men are so weak that if offered sex by another woman, they would be incapable of saying no, even if they were in a happy relationship? And is the wedding ring the only thing stopping us from throwing caution to the wind whenever that guy with the piercing green eyes, or that girl with the fabulous legs, is in town?

Share your experiences with us and let us know what you think.

Girl's Night Out

So hotThe girls were out on the town at the weekend which gave Shoddy another opportunity to demonstrate her fantastic skill at falling asleep whilst standing up on the dance floor. She was awoken only by the kiss of her one true love. Well, some drunken bloke who had taken a shine to her actually.

Before arriving at this smoke-filled den, we had been in Mad Wendy's, a Thai restaurant and karaoke joint. There is nothing more surreal than singing Elvis songs with Wendy, a petite Thai lady adorned in moon-sized wigs and feather boas, whilst dancing on tables and trying not to put your foot in the red thai curry.

But I digress. In the club, we were accosted by many a young man, which is never a bad thing, unless of course, they are too drunk to speak. Which they were. Guys, nobody is going to stick their tongue down your throat if you look like you're going to throw up at any minute. We know it is hard to chat up a girl but being able to remember her name after having been told four times is a prerequisite to a relationship of any kind, including a one night stand.

So what we want to know from both ladies and gents is what chat-up strategies have you encountered or used,what works and what sends you running to the hills for cover.

Men in Tuxedos

We love men in tuxedos. (Top Tip from Shoddy, if you've been a naughty boy, always check that you still have the crotch of your trousers and failing that, wear black boxers...) Who doesn't like the idea of having their own James Bond,suave and sophisticated? We are talking the ultimate in sex appeal. Here is a man who would be able to save you from that would-be attacker, take you away for a night of incredible sex on his yacht all in a fantastically romantic way, of course, or at least in the real world, he might be able to fight his way to the bar and buy you a glass of the house white.

Anyway, the reason we are now drooling is that DD recently went to a Charity Ball where there were a plethora of tuxedos in living motion. She thought it would be a good opportunity, if a little dangerous, to ask a few of the more game men if they would be willing to be interviewed (at a later date) about their relationships with women. This is not as easy as it sounds when you have to withstand the frosty stares of their wives and girlfriends. Nobody wants to be hit over the head with a jewel-encrusted handbag. Especially at a posh do.

But the main problem with interviewing men face to face is that they have a tendency to think you are chatting them up. Or they start to chat you up. They still think this after the interview is over and you have left without making a move. So the question is, would a man who is chatting you up answer the questions truthfully, would they cut out the gory bits and give you the clean version or would they want you to know that they are a 'player'?

The answer so far is a mixed bag. We have had men who have only admitted to total loyalty to their wives and girlfriends. And we have also had some tales that would make your eyes water. All will be revealed in the series.

So would you tell us your deepest, darkest secrets or the edited version or perhaps you would describe to us the life you wish you were leading?! Let's have your comments or email us at allmouth@mac.com