Sex and the Single Girl

The girls were out again on Thursday night but interviewing was not on the agenda until we found ourselves chatting to a group of men who were out after a works convention. All information obtained will be carefully filed away for future use (keep those napkins safe Pippa!)

We returned to the prickly issue of the one night stand. The last time we touched upon it, we were discussing Jack who had nothing but fleeting liaisons. (See One Night Stand). So we asked our new friends what they thought of the women who indulge in one night stands of their own.

Until this week, we had yet to speak to a man who said that he would pursue a relationship with a girl with whom he had had a one night stand. It would appear that the girl's moral integrity would be in question! This is one area where sexual equality is obviously a long long way away.

And then we spoke to a 35 year old who said that it wasn't an issue with him. He says, "Women have itches that they need to scratch too. It wouldn't make any difference to me and hasn't in the past."

When we delved deeper we found that all our older men were of the same opinion. The ones that weren't and disapproved were our younger men. This is the complete opposite of what we would have expected. Are younger men more romantic and idealistic or still under the influence of their mother's warnings about fast women?

And all of those fast women out there, take heart, scratch away to your heart's content, just choose a slightly older man!

Online Dating Diaries III

We visit Chris again, our courageous online dater and find that he has been a busy boy. After his first disaster, he went straight back to it and messaged one woman several times before they agreed to meet. Of her appearance, all he says is, "She had funny teeth." It sums it all up really. There was no chemistry but out of politeness, he agreed to a second date and then changed his mind when she was picked up from the date by three very large, unhappy, growling, rugby-playing sons.

Never one to give up, he decided to vet his dates a little more carefully with more messages and phone calls. With this in mind, he found a woman who looked great on paper (or computer screen) but decided not to take it any further when he had to listen to her talking about the positioning of her printer at work for forty minutes. Yikes!

So he moved onto to date no 3. They had been exchanging lively, flirtatious texts since he had started the dating process but they had not had the chance to meet. He waited at the designated meeting spot for her and after 20 minutes was convinced that she was going to be a no-show as there was nobody in the bar matching the photo of her. He decided to text her and was unpleasantly surprised when a lady with a blue rinse hair-do went to check her phone. The first words out of her mouth were, "I'm young at heart." She was 63. Chris says, "When I saw who answered the phone,I was going to run away but she saw me. She was a lovely woman but I really didn't want to date someone old enough to be my granny. Her photo must have been taken at least 20 years ago. It was a complete waste of my time as it was never going to go anywhere."

This online dating thing really isn't going too well, is it?

Five Things That Turn Him Off Women

We thought we would share more of the things that bug men about women. Just remember, I'm only passing on information...

1. The Drunk

According to some men, women go through a cycle of states when drinking. We have a) sober, b) entertaining, where inhibitions are free, and then c) the over-the-top emotional wreck. Better to stop at b. No man ever wants to see your inner psycho. If he sees it on the first date, you can bet it will be the last! I know, maybe if you weren't that pissed to start off with, you might have noticed that he had 2 heads and wouldn't be talking to him anyway...

2. Too much information, thanks!

On a first date, he really doesn't want to hear about your food intolerances, or the traumatic relationship you have with your parents. He's not even ready to hear about your weird sexual preferences. Save that for later. Remember what I said about the inner psycho?

3. Repetitive Strain Injury

He really doesn't want to text you 101 times during the day, nor be told that the amount of emails he has received from you has crashed the computer system at work. What's wrong with an air of mystery? Let him wonder what is keeping you so busy that you can't reply to him. Give him the opportunity to chase.

Although this goes for boys as well as girls. One of our friends met a guy first the first time at a party. He seemed quite nice and they exchanged numbers. As she was driving home, she got a text from him but didn't reply as she was driving. Ten minutes later, she received another text but was still driving and as she got home, he rang and asked "Why did you not reply, baby?" Needless to say, girls aren't keen on the inner psycho either!

4. Let Me Entertain You

Not only does he have to approach you, dazzle and sparkle enough for you to want to go out with him, he then feels under pressure to entertain you thereafter. So dating becomes hard work. Ok, he admits it's his own fault; he wants to take charge and display his peacock feathers in all their glory. The answer? My suggestion would be for girls to take a circus skills course. He's always going to be happy if you can juggle balls.

5. The Post-Mortem

You will, of course, get to this stage if you ignore any of the above! So why, when it has all gone 'Pete Tong' does the woman need to dissect the reasons why? It's simple, his thumbs hurt too much to text you anymore, your inner psycho terrifies him and your juggling sucks...

Why Girls Love a Bad Boy

Whilst we have been interviewing, some of our men have been asking us questions about girls. It seems that we are often just as hard to understand as they are, so we have decided to answer some of their questions with the help of our girlfriends and all the girls out there who want to help the poor guys out of their fog of confusion.

One of the most frequently asked questions is, 'Why do girls love bad boys?'

The general consensus seems to be that not all girls like bad boys and for those that do, they often grow out of it! We love the excitement of the bad boy, the spontaneity and the uncertainty. (Although where the fun is in staring longingly at your phone still waiting for it to ring three days after he said he would call, I'm not altogether sure!) Women particularly like this kind of challenge when they are younger. Perhaps, as men like the thrill of the chase, women like to see if they can tame the wild beast. If you're lucky, you'll learn pretty quickly that this is impossible and you'll date men who treat you better!

Most of the girls we spoke to agreed that they just didn't want to go out with a sap, somebody who does whatever you want them to do whenever you want them to do it. You just can't respect a man like that. However there has to be a balance between an independent man and a selfish bast**d.

One friend told us that she finds that bad boys exude a certain confidence and this confidence makes them attractive. In fact, it can make them seem more attractive than they actually are. I have to admit, I'm a sucker for the 'arrogant git' and physical appearance becomes irrelevant. No Pippa, you can't post the photos to prove the point!

So take heart all of you nice guys, we do appreciate you, just don't try too hard to be someone you're not and remember that girls like a bit of a spark. And watch out Bad Boys, you might be fun for a little while but we soon get tired of you! Well most of us do anyway...

And if any of you men have a question for the girls just drop us a line and everything you wanted to know will be revealed!

Online Dating Diaries II

We return to Chris, our intrepid online dater and find out how his first date went.

He posted his profile and within 2 hours, he had received his first email. As they were geographically close, the lady in question asked if he wanted to meet that night. Unaware of the complex emailing ritual observed to prevent complete and utter mismatches and carried away by the speed of it, Chris found himself in a pub opposite a woman only four hours after he had decided to try online dating.

She was attractive, French and Chris was beginning to feel that this online thing was great. There was some awkwardness over who buys the drinks and general chit chat in French and English (told you he was a clever man) but what there absolutely none of was any chemistry.

Chris takes up the story, "At the end of a moderately pleasant couple of hours, we decided to go our separate ways and she asked me if I wanted to see her again.Out of politeness and happy that my first outing had not been a complete horror story, I said yes. When I got home, I noticed I had an email. It was from my French woman's profile but was written under a different name. Curious, I thought. Her message was a little surprising and went something like this;

How dare you suggest we see each other again. Trust a man to take advantage of a woman in such a way. I never wish to hear from you again!

Er... I have to say I was more than a little confused. Had she meant this message for someone else? Was she a schizophrenic? Had I been out with one of her five personalities and another wasn't happy about it? I didn't really want to find out."

Did it put him off online dating though? Not at all. I guess his thinking was that it could only get better. Maybe he should exchange emails first though and try to spot and eliminate the obviously mad ones.

Bonne Chance Chris, we'll catch up next week.